Smile Like You Mean It
(Setting is in San Antonio, Texas at the home of Samantha a senior in high school. She is sitting in her living room pondering her mother (who recently left her family) whereabouts. She gets a phone call from her friend Sage who lives in Austin, Texas about a friend they have in common.)
The room was silent besides the faint murmur of a television far off. The walls were vibrant pink with fuchsia stencils of intricate design figures. The couches matched the walls, almost a hot pink. The décor around the room was bright and lively depicting a happy place.
The girl sitting on the couch was exhausted and missing her mother. It had been two weeks since she had seen or talked to her, she just sort of upped and left. She was in a trance staring at the ceiling fan, until she felt a vibration against her leg. It was her cell phone.
“Hey! Long time no talk, what is new?” the girl asked casually as she sat up from her relaxed position on the couch.
A muffled voice responded, “Hey…Have you heard?”
The girl responded, “What? Have you been working out your voice is gone like you have been running….or are you crying? What is wrong?”
“No, I am not working out. He died, Samantha. He is dead,” responded the voice.
Frantically, Samantha pleaded, “who is dead? Who?!”
“It is him…Cleo”
Instantly Samantha dropped her phone into the cushions of the hot pink couch. The walls began to swirl in towards her smacking her in the face with pink. She just sat silently her mind racing…she had just seen him the night before. He was frolicking around the party with that mischievous grin. It could not be she thought as she stood up. She could not grasp the idea as she repeated in her head, “He is gone. He is gone. He is really gone. Cleo is dead?”
For some odd reason saying his name attached to the word “dead” made it reality. Tears flowed from Samantha’s eyes at an uncontrollable rate. It is then that she hears a far off muffled voice calling her name from the hot pink cushions and she remembers Sage on the phone. She managed to scramble in the cushions of the hot pink couch to find her phone.
She calls back Sage, her voice out of breath mimicking Sage’s now, “Hey, how do you
know? What, what happened?”
Sage responds, “his sister's friend.”
“But how? I don’t understand” Samantha demands
“I am not positive, but I know they found him in bed cold to the touch”
“They? Who was it that found him?” Samantha demands again
“It was his mom… and his little brother but he was in the next room. He didn’t see anything.”
“No. I don’t believe it. God bless her. Didn’t she find her mother’s dead body too? This is the second person, my god she must feel cursed. Could you imagine?”
“Never. I would be scarred for life.” Sage began and then Samantha cuts her off
“I would never be the same. Ever. I just don’t believe it” Samantha cooed
“I know, me either. Apparently his mom was calling for him to wake up, she was taking his little brother somewhere and Cleo wasn’t answering her so she got mad and went upstairs yelling his name. He never answered even when she was in his room. She thought he was playing one of his jokes, you know how he is.”
“I don’t get it, a joke?”
“Yeah. She thought it was a joke because of the way he was sleeping he looked like he was pretending”
“What? Pretending? Why would she think that?”
“Well, from what I heard…it’s because of the expression he had”
“Expression? I thought he was dead!”
“He was. His mom didn’t realize that it wasn’t a joke until she touched him and he was ice cold”
“Go on about his face. What was on it?”
“Well he was just lying in his bed with his arms rested behind his head” Sage lingered
“…And? I feel like there is more” Samantha pressed
“There is. Are you sitting down?”
“Yes, I am on my pink couches in my house, I have been this entire time”
“Well, he was laying there with his arms crossed behind his head and…”
“And, what? Come on!”
“He had a big smile across his face”
All the hairs on Samantha’s body stood on end. Chills ran through her body. This was eerie to hear.
“Shut up, Sage! A smile? Why was he smiling?”
“No one knows. Maybe a good dream before he died, who knows”
“Its weird in a way it is somewhat peaceful knowing he left smiling”
“I know, I agree. Apparently its the only thing keeping his mother sane”
At the moment, Samantha’s dad walked in the door to find her humped over with tears streaming down her face, as she lay defeated on the pink couches.
“Hey my dad just walked in Sage, can I call you back?”
“Sure…but wait Samantha”
“Yeah?”
“You can’t say anything to anyone because his sister doesn’t know yet”
“What how could they not tell her…? You know what I will call you back my dad just walked in”
As Samantha got off the phone she looked at her father, everything in her wanted to run up to him and hug him and tell him everything. She wouldn’t have been able to keep her tears back if he asked what was wrong. He didn’t seem to notice anything was wrong. He just gave her a smile and a hug and went back to unloading his truck from a weekend away. Although Samantha was relieved he didn’t realize anything was wrong she also felt hurt at first he could not notice the pain she was. At that moment all she wanted was her mother’s comforting arms telling her everything was going to be all right. The closest she had was her best friend, Sage.
“Sage…hey. He did not notice anything was up. I just really do not want to be alone. Please talk to me”
“Me either. I wish we were in the same city and I would come over. I know this is the last thing you need right now”
In a strained voice to keep from crying, “I know. It is especially hard because I just want her. I want her to be my mother and be here for me”
“I am so sorry, I know how much you love and miss her”
“Yeah” Samantha sniffled back
“It just makes me so angry at her though, Sam. She shouldn’t have done this to your family”
“She was unhappy…I know she is coming back, she just has too…I want to tell her about Cleo”
“She loved Cleo and she loves you, just know that Sam”
“I know that. I know that with all my heart…” she says as she fumbles with a hot pink cushion of the couch.
This reminds her of the Cleo and the numerous hours they spent on this couch watching chick flicks. He loved this couch because of the color.
“ok lets change the subject, enough about me—Cleo…when was the last time you saw him?”
“I always saw him working out at the country club with his trainer”
“Oh yeah, I remember you calling me all giddy because you had such a crush on him”
“Yeah, he was incredibly attractive. It was that smile that got me”
“Everyone was hooked by that smile, Sage. Everyone”
“It is symbolic in a way, you know?”
“I thought that too. I am glad that is the last emotion his mother got to see of him. It was the best”
At that moment Samantha’s phone began to beep indicating she had another phone call coming through. She switched to her incoming call. It was another friend who had learned of the news. She switched back to Sage.
“That was just Claire. People are starting to find out”
“His death was so strange and unexpected, people are starting to gossip about the cause of death”
“Let them then. Those closest to him know he would never do anything to harm himself and we know he did not do drugs. I mean his mom was crazy drug testing him all the time to keep him out of trouble. There is no way”
“I know, it is just such a sudden death and at such a young age it is hard to believe he died of natural causes”
“You don’t think though, do you?”
“No, I will not let myself go there. It’ll only make things worse”
“Do you think we will ever know what really happened to him though Sage?”
“I hope so. His friends deserve to know so we don’t keep questioning. He would want the truth about his death to be known by his close friends”
“But they are such a wealthy, well known family. I could see them trying to cover up the way he died to save his legacy”
“You’re right. I guess I can see his mother doing that. She would have to tell herself it was to protect his legacy but in reality it is to protect the family legacy and herself from scrutiny”
“I hope I am wrong though. I really do” this ends the conversation and Samantha hangs up the phone with Sage.
Weeks pass and no one knows what happened to Cleo. Some speculate suicide as others come forth saying they heard he was into drugs. Cleo seemed like such a happy boy, always smiling…
(Samantha has not talked to Sage in a couple of day and decides to call up her best friend, Sage)
“Hey Samantha! What is up?”
“Nothing really, just thinking about Cleo”
“I was just thinking about him as well. I can’t get him out of my mind. What do you think about what they are saying?”
“It’s hard. I just keep thinking that I thought I knew him so well”
“I know what you mean, I have thought the same”
“It scares me Sage. It really does. I feel like I didn’t know him at all, yet I hung out with him so much”
“You can’t blame yourself Samantha don’t go down the what if road. You knew him better than I did and I think the person he showed you was who he really wanted to be and you helped him be that person”
“But he seemed so happy….so happy. I could have helped him if I only knew”
“No one knew, Sam. Not even his parents, his siblings or his best guy friends knew the depth of his sadness”
“Does that not scare you though Sage? You think you know a person and they are so happy and then this happens…”
“Yes and no. Yes because it happens all the time, its life and no because now I know he is truly happy”
“What do you mean? How could you say that?”
“You know how he always had that mischievous smile and we always asked him what he was hiding?”
“Yeah and he would always chuckle and say ‘nothing’”
“Well I think the smile he died with was real”
“What do you mean?”
“He was finally at peace with himself and done struggling. He no longer had anything to hide, so the mischief was finally gone”
“And that is helpful to you how?”
“Because it is the first real smile he ever gave. It was his last and I think its his way of letting us know everything will be all right now—he is finally…happy”
